In Another Time

These children of mine,
They cold call me on the past,
Asking about when I was young,
But nothing comes to mind.
They think I'm lying,
But I'm not.

Not really.

Sometimes situations arise,
Prompting sudden recall,
Buried memories surface,
And I share;

Carefully.

But mostly,
Everything is gone,
Wiped clean.
It was a different lifetime,
I say.
All those experiences that made me,
All those moments that built me,
And nearly killed me,
Happened in another time.
Every time I learned a little more,
About the world,
About myself,
Brought me here,
To you,
I tell them.

They eye me skeptically.
They seem to think I'm hiding something.

But those times seem to be erased,
Or at least eclipsed,
And really,
That is as it should be.
Because,
Now that you are here,
I say,
Nothing means as much as you.

All that transpired,
In a time before you arrived,
Matters not at all.

And it's true.

But of course,
They think I'm lying.

8-30-19

And They're Off!

I awoke with a start,
In the dark this morning,
Well before it was reasonable.
An unmistakable churning in my guts,
Followed by sweating,
Utter agony,
And a feeling,
That truly,
Really,
I was dying.

Psychosomatic symptoms?
Maybe.
There is a proven track record there.
As a third grader,
Stuck in the class of a villainous,
Sadistic tyrant,
I gave myself hives,
Just because,
I thought I might be held back.
The day we received our report cards,
Miraculously,
I was cured.

But today,
With a vile demon in my stomach,
I'm not so sure.
Yes, yes,
It's their first day.
That could be it.
One starting middle school,
One beginning high school.
Oh, the terror!
I'm not worried about them,
(Although perhaps I should be, right?).
They will ride the tides and tumult of life,
Experiencing ups and downs,
Just like the rest of us.
No,
I'm sick,
I think,
Because what this means,
Is the end,
The end of one sweet chapter.
And,
It means the start of a new,
Unknown story,
That extends into the mists of the future.

Where did those soft,
Defenseless,
Delicate little creatures go?
How has the time passed so quickly?

It's an old lament,
But it makes me sick,
(Even if it's all in my head).
8-14-19